Favourite shirt and expensive flowers
by squg
Summary: Ziva loves Tony  its obvious, but Tony doesn't seem to realiseSPOILERS! Season 5


Authors note: This is my first fan fiction ever, and I only started actually reading fan fiction a few days ago!!

Disclaimers: These aren't my characters – they are all from the television show NCIS and no infringement intended!!

**F****AVOURITE SHIRT AND EXPENSIVE FLOWERS**

Ziva walked over to the elevator and the doors opened almost straight away. Without a second thought Tony jumped up and followed her in, making it just in time.

Neither of them said anything for a while and Tony realized it was up to him to start a conversation if they were actually going to talk.

"You barely talk to me anymore. I don't understand. We used to get on just fine."

He was only making things worse. Ziva turned slightly so that Tony couldn't see her face. She didn't want him to see her like this. She was angry at him. But she loved him all the same. And she was confused. After all he's done. After everything he's put her through…

He was still talking, almost yelling at her, but she couldn't hear a word. It didn't matter what he was saying. It would never be the same between them. There was no point in trying to change it. Why couldn't he see that?

She couldn't make out his words but she could hear his voice eco in her ears. And she couldn't hold it in any longer. Her eyes flooded and a single tear escaped and trickled down her cheek. Tony didn't seem to notice. Not right away. But then he finished his speech and placed his hand on her shoulder. Ziva almost flinched at his touch. This was too much. She couldn't handle it. Not now.

And then he turned her around so that she was staring right into his eyes. Utter shock was written all over his face. Crying, she was crying!! But Ziva didn't cry. She couldn't, could she?

The elevator doors slid open and Ziva removed herself from Tony's grip and almost ran out of the elevator. She didn't dare look back.

Tony, still dazed, just stared at the place where Ziva had stood. The doors shut but he didn't move. And all of a sudden he realized what he'd done. What he'd pt Ziva through.

And he lifted his hand and slapped himself over the back of the head.

It didn't help.

* * *

After that work was almost unbearable, for the both of them.

Ziva couldn't look Tony in the eyes, and neither he into hers after what he'd done.

Ziva had been relieved that there had been a weekend before she had to come back into the office and face Tony again, but she'd been dreading coming in every minute of the two day break.

Abby was the first to notice that something had gotten even worse. Everyone knew that things hadn't been the same between them lately but Abby could sense the extra tension first thing Monday morning. She didn't say anything – she knew Tony to well to get involved, and she didn't want to get on Ziva's bad side, so she stayed well away.

McGee also caught on soon enough and offered to buy everyone lunch. But Ziva couldn't eat so she turned down the offer much to McGee's disappointment. Tony, willing to escape the office as soon as possible decided to go with McGee – a surprise to everyone, but a relief to Ziva.

It was worst when Gibbs noticed. It was about an hour after Tony and McGee had returned from lunch and Ziva and Tony were supposed to be discussing the evidence of a case which they opened last Friday. But Ziva and Tony weren't even on talking about work terms yet, and Gibbs wasn't happy!

"I don't know what happened between you to but you better sort it out before tomorrow or you're both fired."

Ziva was sure he wasn't actually going to fire them, but with Gibbs you never know so she started going over the evidence herself. But she couldn't concentrate and she found herself no further than when she started. Finally it was time to go home. She left as early as she could.

Maybe she would call in sick tomorrow. Anything to be away from Tony.

* * *

Things didn't get much better over the next week, but neither of them got fired since they'd solved the case anyway.

Ziva got up to head to the ladies' room for the hundredth time that day. She'd taken these regular breaks to get away from McGee's anxious looks and the knowledge that Tony was less than few meters in front of her. It was a relief to get away – the tension in the office was so thick you could cut it with a knife. It was a wonder anyone was getting any work done at all. She knew she wasn't doing much.

The bathroom was empty and she relaxed a little – happy to be alone for a while. She turned the tap almost on full and rinsed her face with the refreshing, cool water. It was Friday – the weekend just a few hours away, finally.

When she returned to her desk Tony and McGee were deep in discussion. McGee watched her as she took her seat but Tony didn't look around – thankfully.

Ziva noticed a small piece of paper sitting in the middle of her desk which hadn't been there before. Curious, she opened it to reveal a single word. "Sorry" was written in Tony's unmistakable handwriting in the center of the paper.

Ziva froze. Trying to pretend she hadn't seen the note she re-folded it and shoved it in the top draw of her desk. Quickly she darted her eyes towards Tony and McGee. Tony hadn't moved and neither had McGee who was still silently watching her while he pretended to be interested in whatever Tony was muttering. McGee's expression meant it was impossible for Tony not to have realized that Ziva had read the note.

Slightly annoyed at McGee, she turned back to her computer where she tried her best to get some work done for the last few hours of the day. She didn't dare look over to McGee or Tony again.

* * *

It hadn't worked. He knew it wouldn't, but it was all he could think to do. He couldn't dare confront her again. No, last time he did that things only got worse. He'd realized for the first time that it was all his fault, on that night in the elevator. And what was worse was that there was no way he could fix it.

He'd thought about it tirelessly - trying to come up with a way to make it up to her. But he knew that nothing would work, and so he'd settled with a childish note with one word "sorry" written in the middle. Who was he kidding? For all he knew that simple note could have ruined his chances with her forever. And that was the last thing he wanted.

He'd done more thinking over the past two weeks than he'd done in the rest of his life. He tried to come up with ways to remove the wedge he'd driven between them. But then he realized that it was far too late to take it all back now.

It was midweek and Ziva was acting as though she'd never even seen the note. It could be worse, Tony guessed. But every time he glanced in her direction a sharp pain flashed across his heart and he knew that he'd never be able to forgive himself for this. He couldn't have been more stupid.

When had all this started? Perhaps when he first met Ziva? She was incredible even that first day. And when she replaced Kate he had been quietly pleased. Not because she was replacing Kate, but because he'd get to see more of her – a lot more.

And then he'd met Jeanne. He'd liked her, a lot. But he was always hesitant with her. Something just didn't seem to click.

He should have noticed Ziva then. The way she reacted when he was on the phone with Jeanne. The way she looked at him after she found out they were together. But he hadn't – and at the time he didn't really care. Jeanne was smart and pretty, everything he'd always wanted in a women.

But now that that was over he realized what Ziva had really felt all that time. And he'd realized it way to late. And for that he could never be forgiven.

* * *

Ziva could feel Tony glancing at her constantly. It annoyed her, but she didn't do anything about it. She'd tried spending as much time as she could get away with down in Abby's lab, but somehow things even felt awkward down there.

Gibbs seemed distracted, spending much of his time in MTAC so at least Ziva didn't have to put up with him. But McGee was still there. And he seemed to be staring at her all day, as if it was all her fault.

It wasn't, was it? It was Tony who had made things worse. She didn't mean to make things this bad for the whole team. Surely she wasn't responsible. Then again, if it weren't for her everything would be fine. It seems she was always in the middle of any drama within the team. So maybe this too was her fault.

* * *

It was late. The team had been investigating the murder of a sailor who had gotten involved in the wrong crowd. It was supposed to be a simple arrest – a gang member who had known links with the dead soldier – but it didn't go down as simply as planned.

The team had split up – Gibbs with McGee and Tony with Ziva – as usual. Tony and Ziva had been lead into an alley way with terrible lighting and neither of them could see a thing. And then they heard a gunshot and before Tony knew it Ziva was lying, bleeding, on the ground beside him. His eyes, slightly adjusted to the dark, saw the culprit run around the bend. He felt the urge to be like Gibbs and follow the bastard who had shot Ziva, but for now Ziva needed urgent medical attention and it was up to him to get it for her.

Ziva had been shot in the left side of her stomach. Quickly he ripped of his shirt and did his best to cover the wound. Then he picked her up and carried her into the street. She wasn't heavy, but he had to take extra care to move her as little as possible. He didn't want to hurt her even more.

They reached the entrance to the alleyway, the street lamps making it easier to see. She was bleeding, badly. He put her down as gently as possible and reached for his phone. After calling an ambulance he knelt down beside Ziva and gently put pressure on the wound to slow the bleeding. She let out a slow groan and he stroked her forehead gently to reassure her.

"You're going to be okay – I promise."

He took her hand is his and interlaced their fingers. She was going to make it. She had to. He couldn't let her go, not like this. This was Ziva. She was strong. And he loved her.

_I really do_ he thought to himself and he felt his eyes well up with salty tears. But he wasn't going to let her see him cry, so he bit back the tears squeezed her hand.

And finally the ambulance arrived.

* * *

She was lying in a hospital bed, bored and no use to anybody.

And because she had nothing to preoccupy her, she found her mind drifting to Tony. Tony – who had carried her to safety despite the way she'd been treating him the past month. Tony – who had stood by her and held her hand when she'd needed him most.

She had heard the doctors talking. She'd made it just in time. If it weren't for Tony she'd be dead right now. Dead. It sent a shiver down her spine but the movement hurt her stomach.

He had been incredible. Ripping of his shirt, which she knew was one of his favourites, to cover the wound. Carrying her into the street and calling the ambulance. And then kneeling down beside her and holding her hand. She could have sworn she saw his eyes turn watery and red, but then again, she had just been shot and this was Tony we were talking about.

Ziva wondered whether Tony had bothered to ask which hospital she was at. She hoped so. She didn't expect him to visit – but she still wanted for him to have asked.

* * *

It was late – very late. But Tony didn't care. He had to go and see her tonight.

When he arrived at the hospital and found her room he could hardly bring himself to enter. She was asleep, or so it seemed. She looked so beautiful and peaceful, her head tilted slightly to the left.

He made himself walk in and take a seat. He dragged the chair closer and turned back to look at her. She had woken and was looking straight up at him and he couldn't help but stare straight back. He found himself gazing deep into her eyes – full of the hurt he knew he'd caused. He felt himself longing to reach out and touch her. Take her hand. Hold her close. But he knew he couldn't.

And then a nurse walked in and asked Tony to leave.

"The doctor wants to take another look at the wound."

So he left without another look at Ziva – knowing that he wouldn't be able to leave if he did.

* * *

Ziva was different to most women.

Though he'd never been able to admit it, she intimidated him – a bit. But that wasn't all. With most women it didn't matter how the night went. He'd hook up with her because she looked stunning and they'd hang out for the night and that'd be that. He was more a one night stand type of guy – not really into commitment.

Well, he had tried commitment with Jeanne – but look where that got him. No, one night stands were far better than a long term relationship. No strings attached. That's what he wanted.

But of course Ziva was different again. He'd hurt her before he even realized she liked him – or that he liked her back. And that mad things difficult.

* * *

Tony sent Ziva flowers everyday. He couldn't bring himself to visit her again so this seemed a happy compromise. He was surprised to find that he didn't even care how much it cost – which was quite a lot. He didn't send his name with the flowers. He just had them delivered directly to her room.

Abby and McGee had been to visit her, Abby almost everyday. The doctors wanted to keep her in for a while, they said. She'd be there for another few days under observation, might be out by next Monday.

Abby had noticed the flowers but Ziva wouldn't tell her who they were from and there was no card so Abby couldn't figure it out. She didn't seem to suspect Tony which suited him just fine. And the fact that Ziva wouldn't tell who they were from meant that she knew, and once Abby was out of sight he couldn't help but smile to himself. At least he might be doing one thing right.

* * *

Ziva was back on Monday. But she'd had a little trouble getting into work and was late. She didn't look at Tony which told him that they still weren't talking and he didn't look at her for the rest of the day.

Ziva felt bad, she knew he was the one to send those flowers. And they looked expensive. But flowers didn't change anything in the long run. Besides, they were because she was injured, not because he cared for her. He hadn't come to visit after the first night. She was secretly thankful, but it meant he didn't want to talk to her, so she left him well alone all day.

"One of you two better take Ziva home."

Gibbs said latter that night. He gave Tony a look that said _and its going to be you_.

"I'll do it. I know the way."

He said, trying to sound as though he wanted to. It didn't really work, but that didn't matter.

The drive to Ziva's was silent. Not awkward silent – at least not until Tony quickly glanced at Ziva who just happened to glance at him at the same time. Then it was awkward. Really awkward.

Once they arrived Ziva struggled out of the car, trying to carry her bag. Feeling bad, Tony rushed out and carried it for her to her apartment. She unlocked her door and turned back to say thanks, but Tony was just looking at her. She too began to stare.

Her eyes, they were big and beautiful, and Tony couldn't help but gaze deep within them. He knew he had to stop. This would only make things worse, again – if that was even possible. So he blinked and forced himself to turn around and leave without a word.

* * *

Ziva healed rather quickly and was back to normal within a few weeks – physically anyway. The doctors too had been surprised at her quick recovery. It had been a nasty wound and they were expecting a few minor complications along the way. But it all went well.

Gibbs had planned to keep her doing desk work for a little while longer. But Ziva refused and was back doing field work as soon as the bandages came off from around her middle.

Back in the office Tony and Ziva still weren't talking. But they got the work done. They'd become skilled at doing this without interacting. McGee had become increasingly more popular as the two both asked to discuss the case with McGee alone. He didn't seem to mind – he was almost enjoying himself.

* * *

It was late Friday night and the first time Tony and Ziva had been alone together in the office after work since that night a few months back. Realizing this they both went to leave. Tony suggested that he take the stairs. And Ziva was ready to accept when Gibbs walked past, coffee in hand heading to the directors office.

"What for DiNozzo?"

Reluctantly the pair get into the elevator together. Neither of them look at the other.

Tony went to say something but thought better of it. Curios, Ziva turned around and found herself starring straight into Tony's eyes. What is with his eyes? When she looks at them she just can't look away.

Tony feels a sharp pain sting at his heart, this time he knows why. _This is it_ he thinks. _Its all or nothing_. Hesitantly he leans towards her until their lips meet. He half expected her to kill him with one of her deadly moves, but instead she seems to melt into his arms and hers wrap around his neck.

It's a passionate kiss, but gentle – better than he'd ever have expected it to be. Slowly they pull apart – almost grasping for breath.

"Tony I'm…"

He puts a finger to her lips to silence her and cups her head in his hands and draws her back in.

Neither of them moves when the doors slid open – until they start to close and Tony holds them open with his hand.

"Come on, on lets get out of here."

And he takes her hand in his, interlacing their fingers, and leads her to his car.

* * *

Waking up in his arms the next morning is the best thing that's ever happened to her. Last night might have just been a dream if he wasn't with her now.

Last night was amazing. And to think she had thought that he hated her all this time. To think that he only saved her because it was his job. That the flowers were just him being polite. But it all made sense now. And she loved the way it had turned out. The tension these past few months had been more than worth it.

* * *

At work on Monday Ziva and Tony still don't look at one another. But the tension is gone. After spending the whole weekend together they've had more than enough time to work things out. They didn't really talk much about the past months though, and Tony wanted to keep it that way. He couldn't stand to think about what he'd been doing to her.

Abby notices the change – Gibbs and McGee don't. But its just as well.

They can't look at each other because they know they won't be able to resist each other. That's the problem with falling in love with you're work partner. But they'll work it out.

At lunch the two leave together. McGee is surprised but makes no comment. In the elevator they just hold hands, and they jump in Tony's car and head out before Gibbs has noticed they're gone.

They drive past the sandwich bar they used to go together and end up all the way at Tony's apartment. But once they get into the lift Ziva can't resist him anymore and before she knew it she was all over Tony, who made no attempt to stop her. When they reach his flaw they struggle off the lift and Tony somehow manages to unlock the door. Its only moments before they reach his bedroom.

If this was how it was going to be from now on, then neither of them cared. They loved each other – that was all that mattered.

* * *


End file.
